You know the one. It arrives the day after Thanksgiving. The envelope is double foil lined, the picture of the kids resembles a Gap ad, and the Holiday Letter comes with a warning: Caution! May cause blurred vision, severe feelings of gross inadequacies and nausea. Do not drive motor vehicle or operate heavy machinery while reading this letter. See your doctor if symptoms worsen or you have the sudden urge to go on a Chocolate Binge.
Dear Family, Friends, Former Family Members and Friends who by now should regret no longer being our family or friends–
Whew! Another superb year in the Rinehart Household!
My annual January Spa Getaway was divine! I’ve been given clearance to disclose Michelle joined me for the 3rd year in a row!!! She wanted to bring the girls but I put the kibosh on that. I mean come on, this is MY time to relax and energize after a stressful domestic year. Do you know what it takes to arrange for my personal assistant to arrange for private flights and limo service to get Buffy back to college? And besides, Shelle already took the girls to that spa in Spain. In return, Shelle put the kibosh on Barbara Walters joining us for an interview. That whole Oprah thing during last year’s trip was just too much.
February 14th marked the 25th anniversary of when Scottieopoo and I met! Ever the romantic, he surprised me with an exact reenactment of that night–a single’s potluck with church friends! True to form, he had the company jets fly in all the people who were there that evening and even secured the exact same apartment where we had dinner! He ended up having to buy the entire apartment complex to make that happen but what the hey! Who can’t use another real estate investment?
Both Buffy and Junior skipped their spring break trips to Europe to fly to Japan and aid in the earthquake recovery efforts. Johnny wanted to go but we told him he was too young. Wouldn’t you know that determined, soft hearted boy used his allowance to hire someone to go in his place! How sweet is that?
April took us to the beatiful mountains of Virginia where we so enjoyed the annual spring horse show at Sweet Briar College. Buffy rode exceptionally well! I guess that private instructor is really worth it. Luckily, the head of the equestrian program and other instructors are not offended at all. They and all the girls are too busy enjoying the new Buffy Rinehart Dressage Ring Scottiopoo had built.
Return to this same spot for the 2nd half of our fabulous year!!!
Kiki, Scottiepoo, Junior, Buffy and Johnny
To read the Perfect Family’s Christmas letters from years past go to http://www.karenjrinehart.com.